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CERN Blackhole Spotted by Satellite – 6 Dramatic Images

An old friend is now a disgruntled employee of a secret European space agency. Apparently he was delegated to ‘fetching the croissant duties’ whilst the mighty CERN was fired up – everyone else had ringside seats –  not so the disgruntled employee, so he sulked back to his console, found these sensitive happy snaps from a bird high up in the sky, zipped ‘em up and pinged them my way….

So, What Are We Looking At? 

This is a dramatic 6 image fly-over by a low-orbit satellite revealing the extent of the incalcuable chain-reaction caused by the infamous third beam test in the Large Hadron Collider at CERN. The world’s most powerful particle accelerator has ripped mass into un-fathomable dimensions, leaving many scientists baffled as to what caused the rip in time, space and matter, how to fix the displacement to not only earth and our solar system, but also how they’re going to get their next grants approved in time for Christmas.

Image 1 shows Geneva (right hand side) and the CERN area as a bright green rectangle.

cern-blackhole_1.jpg 

Image 2, as the particle accelerator’s third beam experiment hits over-drive, the release of energy appears as a brilliant flash, and 0.000000001 seconds later, the warping of space and time is clearly visible on the landscape.

cern-blackhole_2.jpg

Image 3, the birth of the black hole, and consumption of mass, appears, as well as a distinct event horizon; energy chewed and ignited into pretty colours. CERN, and surrounding areas, are already disintergrating, with some scientists specualting that all that existed there may never exist again, except in ‘Bizzaro World’. 

cern-blackhole_3.jpg 

Image 4, the Black Hole is consuming matter and seemingly out of control, but is already spent. The next phase, seen seconds laters was completely random and un-expected.

cern-blackhole_4.jpg 

Image 5 shows an apparent worm-hole opened up to an unknown tract of the vast and misunderstood universe.

 cern-blackhole_5.jpg

Image 6, un-verified by leading space agencies as possessing intelligence, these life forms appear to be making contact through the worm-hole. Their intentions are as yet unknown.

cern-blackhole_6.jpg 

Emergency Services have advised people in the region to avoid travelling to Geneva and CERN, as Lake Geneva will soon start pouring into the black hole, and hard-working scientists, having searched for the secrets fo the universe and blown billions of funding, will be wandering around in packs, like dogs, looking for their next source of nourishment.

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One Response to “CERN Blackhole Spotted by Satellite – 6 Dramatic Images”

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